Organization XIII in Kill Xemnas
by Riku54-Vincent's Demon
Summary: Axel believes Roxas is dead because Riku told him Roxas had died. Xemnas is being hunted by Organization XIII and what's up with Mr. Whiskers? BEWARE OF STUPIDITY AND RANDOMNESS! Rated T for lanuage, stupidity, randomness. UPDATING SOON!
1. Randomness isn't all THAT BAD!

WARNING: If you have that decease going around that make random stories such as these, yet you want to read it but will die if you do, then I sujest you go see a docter, get some medicine and be back here within ninety hours. If you still experience death from laughing or shock, ten there is nothing we can do, sorry.

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We interupt this program to bring you Courage the Cowardly Dog Show!

Staring Courage, the Cowardly Dog!

Abandoned as puppy,

He was found by Mereil

Who lives in the middle of Nowhere with her husband Yusetus Bain.

But creepy stuff happens in Nowhere and it's up to Courgae to save the day!

STUPID DOG YOU MAKE ME LOOK BAD! EU GA BOOGA BOOGA!

Riku: O.o Where did THAT come from?

Voice: The spelling is a little bad, but hey I haven't seen the show in forever.

Me: Oookkkaaayyy…Sure I like the show but damn! Who would have thought Organization XIII was watching it?

Organization XIII: Shh! HA ha ha ha!

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Organization XIII in Kill Xemnas

ONE: Randomness isn't all THAT BAD

Axel blinked as he watched everyone glaring daggers at the spot where Xemnas had vanished. Did they know that they were free to eat ice cream and skip around like idiots yet? Probably not. Axel opened his mouth to speak when all at once a figure came out of no where, screaming, and shaking Axel, "AHH! The monsters are coming the monsters are coming!"

"I could have sworn in was the British who were coming, damn! I must have forgotten!" Axel swore and shoved the girl away from him. Hey! Wait a second! That's a girl and she was hugging me! Awww! Wait sec, I do I know-Axel's eyes widened as he realized who the girl was. "Ah! Get away from me!" he yelped, crawling over to where Larexen was. He hid behind her, shaking in fear as he stared at the woman in front of him.

Me: WHAT THE HELL! Where did all of this come from!

Voice: Me! I typed it! MUWHOWHOWHOWHOWHOWHOWHOHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Me: You really need to work on those evil laughs, anyway, now who are you? A sponge?"

Voice: …no, how dare you accuse me!

Me: Whatever, now let me see they damn keyboard you damn hooded-figure!

Voice: Watch your mouth!

Me: Why? Axel doesn't!

Voice: That's Axel.

Me: Hey wait a sec! You sound familiar.

Voice: OKAY BACK TO THE STORY!

Al at once lightning came down and struck the woman and her eyes seemed to poke out of her head for a second before exploding. A foaming, white goo fizzed from what was once her eyeballs. Blood began to drip from her eye sockets, spilling onto the warm concrete below. There was a flash and when it cleared, the woman was covered in wet, sticky blood. She was groaning as she came towards Axel like a lifeless zombie. Blood poured out of her mouth as she tried to speak, but as she spoke, the whole little area became an ocean of hot red liquid that slowly began to-

Me: Who the hell is typing all the bloody goring stuff! That's my job! **looks around** SEPHIROTH!

Sephiroth: MUWHOWHOWHOWHOHAHAHAHAHA! Now my bloody gore is sure to run your viewers away! My plan is full proof! **laughs evilly again**

Me: Shut up, get out, and stay away! **throws Sephiroth into a garbage can.**

Sephiroth: That wasn't nice…

Meanwhile Axel was cowering behind Larexen as the woman shouted, "Axel? Axel is that you? Where did you go honey? Axel? Oh Axel?" The woman had gray hair was all wrinkly. She was stumbling around the place, shaking a cane around, turning in circled.

"Who is that Axel?" Roxas asked.

"My grandmother…" Axel grumbled. He heard people snickering. He looked up at the Organization, fire in his eyes, "You wanna laugh?" he growled.

"OW! Axel get off me that hurts!" Larexen screamed as her shoulder caught on fire. Axel blinked and looked at her grinning, "I guess I could shut you up." Axel summoned one of his chakrams and was about to kill Larexen with it when all at once he was jumped on my Marluxia. Marluxia was glaring at him, "DO NOT HURT MY GIRLFRIEND AGAIN!" he yelled, and punched Axel in the face.

"Hey! That's not fair! We're supposed to kill Xemnas you idiots! That's why the title is called 'Organization XIII in Kill Xemnas'!" Riku growled. "You two lovebirds get off each other and lets go."

Marluxia stopped punching Axel and stood up glaring at Riku, "You looking for a fight?"

Riku shrugged, "Why you want one?"

"Grr! Shut up or I'll kill you!" Marluxia threatened.

Meanwhile Axel stood up clutching his face. He was bloody, so bloody! He ran over to Monica crying, "Hold em Monica hold me! Please?"

Monica shoved Axel away, "Only in your dreams." she growled at him.

"No, actually I think you'd die before it even began." Riku waved him off and vanished into a dark portal. Everyone ran in also with Axel as the last to go. When Axel reached the other side, he saw everyone was celebrating a birthday party. He wasn't sure why but everyone was drinking, Kristen and Saix were dancing on a table, Larexen was hugging Marluxia while Riku was throwing cake at Roxas. Axel blinked and ran over to Kristen and Saix, "Are you guys in love or something?" he asked.

NOTE: Kristen is my best friend and it is sooo fun to sit there and aggravate her, so here's this. She is currently known as 'Faintwail' on this website, so you can go laugh at her all you want. She can't do nothing but come over here and slap me, but like I care. I'm the almighty Riku54! No one can hurt me, nobody!

Riku: Except me! **Slaps**

Me: OW! Hey what was that for?

Riku: I was proving you wrong.

Me: O.o About what?

Riku: About you never being able to be hurt my anyone and so I said except me and slapped you.

Me: Oh…

Kristen: What the heck! Elizabeth I'm going to kill you!

Me: **turns to Kristen** Shut up and stop yelling my name over the Internet! If Heir to the World hears you she'll be able to call me by name and say she stole Riku and that's not any fun!

Kristen: O.o Huh?

Me: Idiot! Hey Heir to the World, here's Sora back!

Riku: **blinks and sighs** Ah, so nice to have peoples fighting over me!

Me: **turns to face Riku** Stay out of this!

Saix: OH KRISTEN!

Kristen: **blinks for a moment** Oh hell no! Get me out of here!

Me: **grabs Kristen** You're supposed to stay in the fan fic, remember?

Saix looked at Axel who was on the ground and kicked him in the face, "Go away and leave us be!"

Axle blinked as he saw stars and fell backwards in a dead faint sing, "Twinkle, twinkle, little star, how I wonder-"

Meanwhile Roxas had told Riku something that was fool-proof. He could kill Xemnas easy. "Alright, if Axle asks, tell him I died. I'll be back." Roxas vanished in a dark portal and went towards the mental hospital. **Grins I wonder who's in the mental hospital!**

Meanwhile Axel had woken up to find Roxas gone and so he went up to Riku. "Hey Riku, where'd Roxas go?"

Riku blinked, "He died."

Axel's mouth dropped open and he fell to his knees crying, "NOOOOO! My best buddy is dead! Now how the hell do you expect me to prank call Saix? No! And I didn't even get to punch him in the face for laughing at me! Hey wait a sec, hey Riku, where's his corpse?"

"Umm…in Larexen's dressing room."

"No wonder he died! Oh well, I guess I'll have to go get the wrecking ball."

NOTE TO READERS: Okay, I got a review that asked when Roxas and Saix looked inside Larexen's dressing room and they wanted to know if it was something bad in there. No, I'm not like Ritzcrackerkitty who types about Sora opening a door and then yelling, "MY EYES! MY EYES!" with soap all in his eyes. I don't do that. No, Larexen's dressing room would just be scary enough without Larexen in it. If she had been in it, we would surly have all died.

"Axel! Wait don't do that!" Riku cried, realizing that Axel meant to go back to Hollywood where Roxas was trying to free Demyx.

Meanwhile Roxas opened the mental hospital door to Demyx's room. He was all dressed in black with a gun a his side. He wore a police badge and wore sunglasses. "Alright, I'm here to take Demyx to the police station."

"But sir, this man is experiencing mental problems that may result in instant death." One Big Man stepped up to Roxas and was about to push him out the door when Roxas killed him on spot by breaking his neck with his Keyblade. The other Big Man came forward and Roxas killed him to before jerking Demyx to his feet, "Come one mental boy!"

"Hey! Roxas I'm not mental!" Demyx cried.

"You are if you think you can talk to evil, demented, rabid squirrels!" Roxas growled.

"I can talk to rabid squirrels!"

"Well you were put under a trance, right?"

"Yeah I guess so."

"Are you still in that trance?"

"How should I know? Eeeuuuwwwww! Look! A flying cow!"

Roxas blinked and stared at Roxas, "What did they do to you?"

"Drugged me with a giant needle! And it HURT like hell!"

Roxas rubbed his ear as Roxas screamed in it and muttered, "Sorry I asked." Before vanishing into a dark portal with Demyx.

When Roxas returned he found Riku tying Axel up, who was yelling at him for not letting him go burn Roxas's body. Riku was rolling his eyes as he tried to keep the evil demonic pyro under control. After he was sure Axel was tied up, he kicked him and made Axel fall down in the ground. Riku then walked over to where Roxas and Demyx were watching. "He wanted to go destroy Larexen's dressing room for supposedly killing you. He said he still had to hit you and so Axel tried to go get a wrecking ball, but I wouldn't let him." Riku finished.

"Okkkaaayyyy…"

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Hope you lied! Review-more randomness is coming! PLEASE NO FLAMES! 


	2. Playing Baseball While Breaking Windows!

Srry it took me so long to update. I've been working on 'Ansem's Daughter' so yeah. PLEASE REVIEW! This chappie is funny!

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DON'T KILL ME KRISTEN!

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WARNING: This next chapter contains dancing rabid popcorn. If you read this and suddenly find yourself going crazy then you need to sit down and go read a serious fanfic that isn't random or stupid because you may catch the I'm-Crazy-And-Work-For-Rabid-Dancing-Popcorn sickness.

TWO: Playing Baseball While Breaking Windows!

"STRIKE OUT YOU'RE OUT!" Axel shouted as he caught the baseball. He then threw it back to Larexen where it busted her nose. She clutched her face screaming, "NOOO! MY GOOD LOOKS ARE RUINED!"

"Oh poor you! Good thing I got Saix!" Kristen yelled from across the baseball field.

"Good grief why the hell is Kristen in this fan fiction anyway?" Axel yelled at the sky.

Me: because I'm mad at her

"Oh okay, well…"

Demyx swung the bat as Larexen threw the ball, aiming for Axel and the bat made a loud CRACK and the ball flew through the air and crashed into Xemnas's window. "AWESOME! EVERYONE GET THE ROPES AND THE CANNON!" Axel shouted.

Everyone swarmed around Demyx, evil looks in their eyes as they tied him up and shoved him into a cannon. "FIRE!" Axel roared, igniting the fuse. Demyx screamed in terror as he sailed through the air. The Organization had been aiming for the hole in the window but poor Demyx crashed through the glass just beside the hole. They watched as glass shards fell to the concrete, smashing into microscopic pieces.

"Oh well!" Everyone shouted and then a cake appeared out of no where. There were wedding bells in the distance and Saix and Kristen-

Me: OW! OW! OW! OW! OW! OW! OWWWW! RIKU HELP ME! SHE'S MURDERING ME!

Kristen: DIE YOU EVIL BEST FRIEND! DIE! 8continues to beat Riku54 senseless

Riku: **glances at them** You deserve it.

Me: BUT IT'S NOT ME WHOSE TYPING!

Riku & Kristen: Then who is it?

Me: IT'S THE VOICE!

Voice: um… I had nothing to do with this.

Me: WHO ARE YOU?

Voice: Someone you know

Me: NO DUH! WHY AM I TALKING IN CAPS?

Voice: BECAUSE I WANTED YOU TO!

Me: HEY! NOW YOU'RE TALKING IN CAPS!

Voice: Yeah well-

Kristen: SHUT UP AND FORGET THE STUPID WEDDING BELLS EVER HAPPENED!

Riku & Riku54: **cowers down in fear for their lives** okay…

Kristen: GOOD!

Kristen stood beside Saix in a wedding dress looking crestfallen. "Okay, Kristen and Saix you can get married if you want to." Axel said.

Kristen and Saix looked at each other and grabbed someone that could make them get married. "Saix do you take Kristen to be your lawfully wedded wife?"

Saix nodded, "I do."

"And do you Kristen take Saix to be your legally wedded husband?"

"I do."

"You may kiss the bride."

"EWWWW!" Roxas and Axel yelled, covering theirs.

Roxas heard Axel sigh:"If only that me and Monica."

Monica glares at Axel and slaps him in the face.

Kristen: WHAT DID I JUST SAY?

Everyone: Quickly rushes to find keyboard and deletes what just happened above.

Meanwhile…

Mr. Whiskers was prancing around the castle, looking for something to eat when-

BOOM! AHHHH! CRASH!

Mr. Whiskers jumped five feet in the air and quickly ran to hide only to find himself standing in front of his old master who was clutching his eyes yelling, "HELP ME MOMMY! HE'S GOING TO EAT ME!"

"Awww! Are you afraid!" Mr. Whiskers asked Xemnas, unsheathing his claws.

Everyone: O.o

Xemnas suddenly removed his hands and looked down at his cat, crying like a sissy. (he's a girl? LOL) "Mistor Whiskors!" Xemnas said as if he were just learning to talk. He picked up his kitty. "Aww! Disgusting Yet so Fuzzy and Cute! I knew you woved me! Now we can take over de world!"

"AHH! GET AWAY FROM ME!" Mr. Whiskers screeched but Xemnas held on, saying, "No, no kitty, you might just get urt out there in dis big ol' world of ours!"

Suddenly there was another BANG and Xemnas turned around to see L.R.S 3 racing down the staircase, yelling, "I SHATH RULE YE ALL!"

"RABID SQUIRRELS SHALL EAT YE ALL ALIVE!" S. I. C. yelled. (second in command)

Me: Hey! That's my screen saver!

Riku: What?

Me: Rabid Squirrels Shall Eat Ye All Alive!

Riku: O.o Okayyy

Me: Yeah, I had it as something but I changed it.

Riku: That's strange

Me: I know

Riku: You know that you can be VERY random sometimes despite the fact with some of the serious fan fics you've wrote that have little humor in them

Me: Yeah, I'm writing one for Final Fantasy VII and it's called 'Sephiroth Murder' and I was reading it today when I discovered that it sounds rather f-

Voice: Are you gonna sit here and chat or let me continue to type?

Me & Riku: Oh go ahead!

Axel: I'M SUPPOSED TO BE IN HERE!

Everyone: **blinks** Is Axel okay?

Riku: **has Way to Dawn in his hands and slams it into the back of Axel's head** Not anymore

Everyone found themselves surrounded by man-eating rabid blood-thirty deranged, stupid, dumb, idiotic, rabid, chaoctic, cow-killer-man-horse-shoed-footed squirreles.

Readers: What the heck? TO MANY ADJECTIVES! MY BRAIN I SMELTING!

Cast of 'Kill Xemnas' and Me and Riku: I think you mean 'melting'

Readers: uh…yeah…maybe the randomness is getting to us

WARNING: If you happen to somehow have survived the first part of this fanfic, well I'm afraid your brain-if you have one-is going to melt or self destruct if you read the oncoming text of 'Kill Xemnas'

Squirrels

WARNING: This is your final warning!

Were at a

WANRING: DON"T READ IT PLEASE!

EVERYONE: SHUT UP WITH THE WARNINGS!

Voice: okay….

Squirrels were at a tea party, jumping around very hyperly while sipping boiling hot tea, foam filling their mouths and they growled at Axel and Roxas who were tied up and about to be pushed into a boiling pot of water.

"This is the end good buddy!" Axel yelled over the squirrels loud squeaks and squeals.

"Axel, if you must know, I told Monica that you were dating Kadaj and she thinks your gay!" Roxas confessed.

"WHAT!"

"Well I figured this was the time to tell you since were going to die and all."

"YOU TOLD HER WHAT?" Axel snarled, standings up and throwing Roxas into the boiling pot of water. L.R.S 3 comes up to him and shakes Axel's hand, "Congrats, amego, you just win your prize now, please stare at dis television and all your dreams will comes true!"

Axel blinked. This squirrel sounded funny but he held up a television and Axel immideanty began staring in it and as he did this, he began to drool.

"Now go and find Mr. Whiskers, our king and bring him to us!" ordered L.R.S. 3

"Yes master…"

&&&

Well that's all for this chappie! REVIEW


	3. Beware of the Randomness

THREE: BEWARE OF THE RANDOMNESS!

Axel was walking like a zombie through town, drool dripping from his mouth as he walked yelling, "Mistor Whiskors! Where aarree yyyooouuu?"

Meanwhile Riku was partying with Cloud, Sephiroth (O.o), Ansem (O.o), Xehanort (O.o how the heck is he here?), Ansem the Wise (O.o), Mr. Whiskers? (O.o O.O what the heck?), Sora (O.o), Kairi (O.o), Namine (O.o),and (OMG!) Replica Riku, Tidus, Wakka, Selphie, Yuna (O.O HOW DID SHE GET HERE?), Auron (O.o) Jecht (HELLO!)

Readers: Somebody's been playing Final Fantasy X too much!

Me: I know! **Grins**

Jecht was throwing a beer bottle at Axel who was still fifty miles away and it clucked him on the head and Axel fell down on the concrete, drooling saying, "Durrrrrrrrrrrr"

Everyone: O.o

Me: THIS FAN FIC IS SO NOT STRAIGHT FORWARD!

Voice: I know! Alright! I'm typing now! **shoves Arkath out of the way**

Suddenly the party ended and everyone died. The end.

Me: WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT!

Voice: My typings

Cloud & Sephiroth & Kadaj & Yuna & Tidus & Wakka & Lulu & Kamarhi & Auron: Cuts voice in half yelling :IF YOU'RE GOING TO PUT US IN THIS THEN TYPE IT RIGHT!

Readers: But you're not in this Lulu or Kamarhi!

Riku: You know they have a point…

Axel: Hey! I just realized there isn't any dancing rabid popcorn!

Everyone: O.o but that's waaaayyyyyy to random!

All at once dancing rabid popcorn surrounded them and began to eat them all alive! Riku grabbed a can of rabid popcorn repellent and sprayed it on the popcorn.

Meanwhile Xemnas was running down the stairs, fleeing from L. R. S 3, yelling, "Stay away from me L.R.S 3!"

Suddenly every squirrel stopped and he heard L.R.S 3 squeal, "I am L. R. S. 4! BEWARE OF MY ALMIGHTY SQUIRRELLY SQUIRREL POWERS!"

"Oh, I'm sorry miss." Xemnas said before turning around and yelling like a sissy, "AHHHH! MOMMY THEY'RE GOING TO EAT ME!"

Mr. Whiskers rolled his eyes as he continued to strut down the hallway until he got bored and summoned a kitty dark portal and vanished to where the party was.

Mr. Whiskers put on a party hat and started doing the disco. Veryone including the dancing rabid popcorn turned to watch and Riku held up a sigh that said 10

Jecht: 8

Yuna: 10

Auron: HOW THE HECK IS THAT CAT DOING THE DISCO?

Readers: O.o

Cast: Getting rather random huh?

Cloud: I'll say! Oh and what happened to Cloud, Sephiroth, Sephiroth, and Kadaj?

All at once Sephiroth (kh2) came flying out of the sky and crashed into the crowd right beside Cloud. "Ugh…Cloud…I'll stop bugging you if you elp me!" Sephiroth said saying 'elp' instead of 'help'.

Cloud blinked, "What the heck did they do to you!"

"DIE!" came a cloud voice. From the sky Sephiroth (FFVII) came soaring down, his sword aimed right where Sephiroth's heart was. Sephiroth (KH2) vanished just in time as the blade slammed into the ground and sunk deep into it. Sephiroth (KH2) appeared again and was begging Cloud on his knees.

Cloud blinked and growled, "As long as I get to kill you after this."

"AGREED!"

"Not happin' he's dead!" Kadaj growled, coming out no where.

"Wait! You want to kill you brother?" Cloud (KH2) asked suddenly.

"Well…no but this one is Cloud's (KH2) darkside, not the Jenova project!"

"I AM THAT CLOUD AND THAT IS MY DARK SIDE!" Cloud droar, throwing sword through kadaj's he-

Flicker

Flicker

We are sorry to say but this is too violent for people under the age of 97. Meanwhile you can listen to Larexen ramble on about things you can't-oh wait it's over!

Blood gushed from kadaj's head as Cloud's sword stabbed through it but Sephiroth (FFVII) yanked his sword out and was rushing towards Cloud to cut him in half-

Opps! No it's not over yet!

"ANYWAY! As I was saying, please come to my Dooms day show because if you come, you will get the best prize of all! You get to watch Axel get his head blown off and free tickets to my spa so you can go jump in the acid and I'll never have to deal with you again!" Larexen ramble on.

NOW IT'S DONE!

Cloud and Cloud killed Kadaj or so they thought until L.R.S 1 came up as popcorn and threw Axel's chakram at Cloud which he still had from when he had taken it from Axel in Organization XIII Castrophe. Cloud dodged and with Leon's help (O.o where'd he come from)

Meanwhile Axel stood up mumbling, "miss whisky!"

L.R.S. 3: I think we choose wrong thing

Raid Squirrels: Ya, let kill him!

L.R.S. 3: No, he come handy!

Me: MWHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Readers: Why'd you laugh?

Me: Because I have now discovered who voice is and now I am typing straight forward from now on!

Readers: YAY! We think….who is it?

Me: Who do you think is evil to all of us? GET OVER HERE YOU DERANGED IDIOT! **drags out a guy with a lawyer suit on**

Riku: **gasps**

Everyone: **gasps**

Me: I KNEW IT WAS YOU! DUB LAWYER NOT LETTING US OWN KINGDOM HEARTS OR FINAL FANTASY OR RIKU OR ANYONE ELSE!

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Well that concludes this Chappie!

See the little purple button? It begs you to review! And now this lawyer says he'll sue you if he don't. **holds knife to throat** Whispers: Yeah tell them that!

Okay…DON"T EAT ME LAWYERS! 0.O

Alright, if I get a few reviews, not a specific number, I just want a few, I will update! Chapter Four is called

OMG! MR. WHISKERS IS ON MEOW MIX!


	4. OMG! MR WHISKERS IS ON MEOW MIX

WARNING: This chapter contains a cat in commercials that kills there-DON"T TELL THEM-AND also contains Sephiroth and his whole creepy act about looking at himself in a mirror. Also Xemnas is acting very creeping and we all know that your brain has SURELY exploded by now so there's no need for the 'MY BRAIN HURTS' thing…

FOUR: OMG! MR. WHISKERS IS ON MEOW MIX!

Demyx was watching TV as everyone partied, well now Riku was beating the heck out of rabid squirrels and Mr. Whiskers was prancing off into a dark portal. He sighed and yawned, nothing interesting. Demyx turned the channel and suddenly sat up, staring wide eyed at the television. THE HORROR!

Me: See! It's straight forward! YAY!

Lawyer: I should sue you… 

Riku and Me: SHUT UP!

Lawyer: Ahhh…

Demyx saw that Xemnas was break dancing on a weird show that Demyx didn't know the name of. What was worse, was that Xemnas was wearing a _BALARINA SUIT! _Demyx suddenly started screaming, "**_EVERYONE GET OVER HERE! XEMNAS IS ON TV BREAK DANCING IN A BALARINA SUIT WITH RABID POPCORN_**!"

Everyone turned to look at Demyx-including the rabid squirrels/popcorn-and rushed over to the TV. Riku put a recording tape in saying, "Wait till this reaches the internet!"

Riku54: AND THIS CHAPTER TELLS YOU THAT THERE IS GOING TO BE A FOURTH BOOK CALLED…I'm not entirely sure yet. Tell ya get a name!

Riku: YAY! I'm responsible for this! YAY! **turns to readers** now ye shall all bow down and thank me!

Readers: BOOO!

Rikufangirls: YAY! MY RIKU!

Me: **HISS** GO AWAY!

Sephiroth: GEOSTIGMA SHALL KILL YE ALL!

Me: Where did _that_ come from?

Sephiroth (FFVII) leapt away from his enemies, taking out a mirror and looking at himself, "Look at how much sexier I look that that other Sephiroth!"

Me: Ohhh…LAWYER!

Lawyer: What?

Me: WERE YOUR EADING 'CLOUD HUNTING SEASON' AGAIN?

Lawyer: Mmmmaaaayyyyyybbbbbeeeee

Me: I love that fanfic it's funny but Sephiroth get s A LITTLE over dramatic about the whole 'I'm sexier than you' thing! LOL

Riku: No dur!

Sephiroth (KH2) blinked and snapped, "BUT WE LOOK ALIKE YOU BOZO!"

Sephiroth (FFVII) "That may be so but I am still MUCH sexier than you!"

Cloud groaned and yelled, "WOULD YOU TWO JUST SHUT UP!"

Sephiroth and Sephiroth turned to look at him and then suddenly got into a fist fight. Kadaj came up beside Cloud blinking, "Who would have thought my brothers are idiots?"

Cloud gave him a what-are-you-stupid? look and replied, "If you haven't figured that out yet, I feel sorry for you."

"Yeah…I'd feel sorry for me to-HEY! Wait a second!" Kadaj growled, holding up his Souba. (Souba is his two-bladed sword for those who do not know).

Me: Okay, too MUCH thinking! MUST PUT ULTIMATE RANDOMNESS IN THIS FANFIC!

Riku and Everyone: NOOO!

Readers: YAY!

Me: **grabs keyboard and begin typing, tying up Lawyer and Arkath while Riku watches over my shoulder** BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Axel walked around the city, snapping out of his trance, he goes up to Monica and asked, "Hey Monica, will you go out with me if I gave you a picture of Sephiroth and put on a mask that looked like Sephiroth?"

Monica looked at him and did not reply for a moment. Then Axel noticed that she had a-uh-on-an anvil in her hands! She lifted it up and cracked it over Axel's head and Axel fell down, saying, "I love you! You lov-"

Monica continuously beat Axel with the anvil until he died. Oh well.

Roxas was surrounded by indian squirrels and was trying to fly away like a little birdy, but he couldn't flap his wings-er-arms fast enough. "I MUST FLY LIKE A BIRDY!"

Me: Idiot

Riku: Yep, he's a git!

Ansem: DARKNESS!

Mr. Whiskers sat in front of a camera and posed, singing, "I got da power!"

"RIGHT ON DISCO KITTY!"

"Meow meow meow meow moew moew meoew moew meow!"

Riku: You spelled 'meow' wrong.

Me: So what? HE'S SINGIN THE MEOW MIX SONG!

Demyx stared at the commercails as it showed a Meow Mix comercail. Mr. Whiskers was there singing the Meow Mix song but then he started doing the disco singing, "I GOT THE POWER!"

Everyone died luaghing and exploded. The end.

Riku: NOOOOOO! **erases what Riku54 typed** I AM NOT DEAD!

Me: Course you're not! You're right here! **gives Riku a hug**

Riku: **Mutters something about stupid fangirls always hugging him**

Me: **glares at Riku, growling** What was that?

Riku: **holds up hands, shaking them** NOTHING!

Me: Good. **Begins typing again**

Axel was eating a bowl of Lucky Charms, his head perfectly normal after Ansem had inflated it with a car-tire pump. Suddenly Ansem grabbed his Lucky Charms and shoved them in the microwave. "HEY!"

Me & readers who have read the thing about 'Kingdom Hearts at the Theme Park': OH NO! NOT AGAIN!

Suddenly the microwave exploded, roasting Axel and Ansem. Axel was squealing with joy at being caught on fire while Ansem was yelling, "DARKNESS! NO! HELP ME DARKNESS! DARKNESS! DARKY WHY HAVE YOU BETRAYED ME!"

Well I guess that's the end of this chapter! Too bad for you! Oh well…I have to go type some more of 'Random Adventures of Riku, Sephiroth, Ansem etc.'! THEY'RE GOING TO DISNEY LAND!


	5. SHUT UP AlREADY SEPHIROTH!

srry i haven't updated in such a long while-well chappie six is the last chapter then its on to the sequel!

* * *

FIVE: SEPHIROTH WOULD YOU JUST SHUT UP!

Me: Why is this chapter called this again?

Lawyer: I dunno

Me: THEN PERISH BY MY ALMIGHTY AUTHORESS POWERS!

Riku: **grabs flame-thrower from Riku54 and chunks it out the window** Quit that!

Me: BUT ITS FFFFUUUUNNNNN!

Lawyer: THANK YOU RIKU! **gives Riku a hug**

Riku: **freaked out look** OKAY YOU CAN FLAMETHROWER HIM!

Me: YAY! **grabs another flamethrower and torches the lawyer until he is little bits of crisp on the floor!** YAY!

Readers :NOW WHO'S GOING TO WRITE THE STORY?

Me: Riku is!

Riku: **gasps** WHAT!

Me: Yep, I want to see if you're random or not!

Riku: **blinks** Okay…I'll try…how random do ya want it?

Me & Readers: VERY RANDOM!

Riku: Okay!

Sephiroth (Kh2) glared at Sephiroth (FFVII) (we'll call him Sephy) and looked back down at his mirror, muttering, "I look better than you! SEE?"

Sephy blinked but did not tear his eyes away from the mirror in front of him. There were some fan girls staring at HIS-not Sephiroth's mirror. HE felt so loved! Cloud and Kadaj were rolling their eyes, while playing go-fish.

Meanwhile, Demyx had been beat senseless into the ground by this gaint thing that had blue hair that was long and had these vein-like things covering his face. He looked evil, yet royal as he lunged at the TV, muttering something about destroying something called Spira. (guessed who it was yet? IT'S SEYMOUR!)

Seymour was getting hit over the head by Tidus who was growling, "Grr! Die! You made Yuna marry you! DIE DIE DIE DIE DIEI DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE!"

Somewhere on a distant planet, there were these aliens who lived in-

Me: RIKU! NOT THAT RANDOM!

Riku: Shut up and let me type! You'll see in a moment

Kristen: GRR! Make me divorce Saix right now!

Riku: Okay!

Me: What? No!

Kristen stood beside Saix at the alter and suddenly she threw her flowers at him, yelling, "Disgraceful idiot!" and ran off towards the party where everyone was watching TV.

Meanwhile, on the planet there were these aliens who lived in craters of cheese. They squeaked and hissed. Venom dripped from their dull, nearly harmless teeth.

Me: Okay enough of that-BACK TO ROXAS AND AXEL!

Sephys: NO!

Sephiroth (FFVII) stared at himself in the mirror, not even looking at everyone else as he spoke, "I am sooo much hotter than you guys!"

Sephiroth (AC) "You wish, I'm much more sexier than you, ya jackass! I'm the more graphical, most-real out of all of you!"

Sephiroth (CC) turned away from his fully-body mirror and glanced at every Seph. in the er…little area… "Well EVERYONE loves an Anime Sephy!"

Suddenly they heard someone counting.

Kadaj: 1…2…

Cloud: 3! RELEASE THE FAN GIRLS!

Kadaj: okay,

All Sephys: Oh shit…

Kadaj & Cloud: MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

All the Sephys' eyes widened in horror as they saw the mop of rabid fan girls coming their way. "RUN!" Sephiroth (FFVII) yelled at the top of his lung. It didn't take them two seconds to run half way across the world and hide in the place where Organization XIII was staying. Sephiroth (LO) hide right behind Riku, Sephiroth (BC) tried to get Saix to hide him, but Saix only slung him out a window and continued to beat him senseless for intruppting him watching TV. Riku stabbed his Dark Keyblade in Sephiroth (FFVII&CC&AC) in the heart and they all stood there, dumb looks on their faces before suddenly brightening and becoming all flowery like causing Cloud to come over and beat the rap out of the Sephiroth's because they reminded him of Aeris, who they had all killed.

Anyway, the Rabid Squirrel Planet was very boring so all of the rabid squirrels decided to run down to the World That Never Was and take over it while Organization XIII wasn't there.

"The court is now in session," LRS4 began, tapping her big stick-thingy on a piece of wood. All of the little, stupid Rabid Squirrels looked up at their 4th leader and bowed down before straightening up. "Bring out the prisinor!" LRS4 demanded, her squeaky voice sounded like she was hissing.

Suddenly the court room doors open to reveal the Rabid Squirrels carrying a tied up, and gagged Roxas like someone would carry someone if they were in an angry mob. "What is his sentence?" one rabid squirrel asked.

"Hmm…Death."

Roxas: WHAT! YOU'RE GOING TO KILL ME!

Riku54: **laughs** No! No! LRS4 would never do that! She's Riku's pet squirrel!

Roxas: Pet Squirrel? Riku has a pet SQUIRREL? THAT'S RABID?

Riku54: Yes.

Riku: And I'm proud of it!

Riku54: And guess what guys! It's time to bring in a special guest-and also my bodyguard-Vincent Valentine!

Vincent: **walks over to Riku54** Why must I be everyone's bodyguard?

Riku54: **smirks** Because I told you too.

Vincent: **glares** ….what if I don't want to?

Riku5: You have no choice

Vincent: There's always a choice…I didn't save Lucrecia…my Lucrecia…

Riku54: **glares and then yells, beating Vincent with a baseball bat** NEVER MENTION THAT NAME AROUND ME!

Vincent: **backs away** Okay! Okay!

Riku54: Good, cuase I'm a fangirl of Riku, Cloud, and you!

Vincent: **eyes widen** WHAT! NOOO!

Riku54: Heh-Heh

Roxas: Um…what are you going to do to me?

Riku54: I dunno. Shoot you I guess.

Roxas: WHAT!


	6. Stupidnessness

CHAPTER SIX: Stupidnessness

Roxas looked over at Axel, who had been caught again because he had failed to find Mr. Whiskers. "Well, buddy, you don't have to be mad anymore! I told Manica that you hadn't made out with Kadaj, or Marluxia, but Larexen! See, aren't I nice?"

Axel turned to look at Roxas, his eye twitching, "Repeat that."

Roxas did.

"YOU'RE SO DEAD!!!!" Axel roared, his green eyes flashing as he grabbed Roxas by the throat. Before Axel could have a chance to strangle Roxas, a whale fell out of the sky and landed on top of him.

Me: Hello!

Riku: Well, the reviewers DID say that wanted a whale! Anyway, back to the world of rabid squirrels!!

Me: NO! I'm typing Riku!

Lawyer: I forbid you both to continue this!

Vincent: **grabs Death Penalty and shoots lawyer**

Me: Thanks Vincent!

Vincent: …

Sephiroth (KH): Get back to me!!

Sephiroth (FFVII): No me! I'm MORE popular!!!

Voice: NO! I AM!!!!!

suddenly Sephiroth (anime) comes in.

Sephiroth (Crisis Core or CC): FEAR ME!!!

Me: Wow! That's a lot of Sephiroths!

All Sephys: WE SHALL RULE THE WORLD!

All Sephys: NO I SHALL!

All Sephys: **look at one another** STOP COPYING ME!!!

Loz: I WANT MY MOMMY!!!

Everybody: O.O

Meanwhile Xemnas was now tap dancing in a balarena suit, twirling around with the rabid popcorn, that had bitten him and taken control of his mind. Riku was recording the whole thing and was going to upload it on the computer. That would be so fun!!!

Meanwhile… 

All Sephys: ALRIGHT! I'LL CUT YOUR HEAD OFF IF YOU DON'T STOP COPYING ME!!!!

A.S.s (all Sephys (duh)): That was odd….

A.s.s: HISS!!

Riku: Hey have you guys realized what All Sephys is? It spells ass!

Me: RIKU! SHUT THE HELL UP!

Riku: Why? That was funny!

Me: Okay then, you're a jackass so shut up!

Vincent: ….

Sephy (Crisis Core: Now I shall destroy the whole world!!!! MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Sephy: (FFVII: NO! GIVE ME BACK MY BLACK MATERIA RIGHT NOW STRIFE!!!!!

Cloud (rabid squirrel form): Yes master… 

Sephy (KH): Don't I get a say in this?

Sephy (FFVII0 Sephy (Crisis Core): NO!!!!!

Sephy (Kh): Ahh man! MOMMY JENOVA THEY'RE BEING MEAN TO ME!!!

JENOVA: Why oh why are they my sons? Somebpody shoot me!

Vincent: Gladly. **raises Death Penalty**

JENOVA: I didn't mean that literally!

**BANG**

Everyone: Oh well!

All Sephys: NO!!! WHAAAAA MOTHER!!!!!

Kadaj: Mother?! Mother?! WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!! (awww! He's crying!! LOL)

Axel didn't know how he was supposed to get out of the whale. Well, tectnically, he wasn't inside of it, just squished like an ant. Ow! "Mommy! I miss you! Please give me my blanky!!!" Axel cried out into the air.

All at once he heard funeral music playing, and then Roxas speaking, "NO NO! WRONG SONG! Play 'Hallelujah He's Dead!'

"What's that song?"

"LET ME SEE THAT TRUMPET!!! Now, Leader Rabid Squirrel 4; it's your line now!"

Suddenly a loud squeak filled the air, "AND THE HEAVENS SING!"

Kristen: hey! What's the deal?! That is MY line!!!

Me: Grr! Get over it!

Kristen: **glares**

Meanwhile Xemnas had finished him tap dancing and was now break dancing, wearing make-up and was calling a sergeon to have plastic sugery done.

Me: HOLY HELL!

Riku: Riku54, hell is NOT holy!

Me: I KNOW THAT!

Riku: Then why did you say 'Holy Hell'?

Me: Cause I can! ALRIGHT WHOSE TYPING THIS DAMN FIC NOW?!

Lawyer: Ughh…**walks around like a zombie**

Vincent: We know it's not him.

We interrupt this investigatio to bring you to the Interviewing Station where we have Squall Leonhart in for questiong of the death of Rinoa

Squall: **freaked out look** DON'T EAT ME DOGGY! **rabid dog glaring at him**

Reporter: Did you kill your girlfriend Rinoa?

Squall: **blinks** Who the f& are you?! HELLO, she's my girlfirend, why would I kill her?!

Reporter: Trust me, peoples on Ear-th (as Pleaki says off of Lilo and Stitch)

Kill their girlfriends

Dr. Phill: HOW HORRIBLE!

Me: GET THE HELL OUT OF MY FAN FIC!!!

Dr. Phill: But! But! Aw phoey!!

Squall: Well…um…if I killed her, where's the weapon?

Reporter: **grabs Squall's Gunblade and puts it in the little stand next to the judge (hello where's this comin from?)** You! Gunblade! You look pretty suspicious! WHERE WERE YOU JULY 2; 3 AM!!!!

Me: What?! She was killed on July 2?! I FEEL SO LOVED!!!

Riku: Why?

Me: **glares** WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN??? July 2 is my birthday you moron!

Riku: Grr! I've been here waiting for YOU to get off your lazy ass and start typing some more!

Me: **Hiss!**

Squall: **pushes second screen out of picture** Okay now, I don't think my Gunblade can talk and that I couldn't have killed Rinoa because-

Leon: YOU STEALEDED MY GUNBLADE SQUALL!

Squall: **turns to look at Leon** Are you MY clone?

Leon: NO! You're mine!

Squall: **stealses Gunb;lade back** NO WAY! YOU'RE MY CLONE BECAUSE um…ah…uh…

Leon: You sound like that 'guy'….

Squall: Who? OH hey! STOP CHANGING THE SUBJECT!!!!!

Leon: Oh sorry Copy

Squall: What did you just call me…-SHAGRUG!

Leon: WHAT WAS THAT?!

Sephiroth (Final Fantasy VII): THAT IS MY LINE SQUALL LEONHART!!!!!!!! I SAY THAT ON CLOUD HUNTING SEASON! YOU ARE THE SHAGRUG!!!!!

Me: Random and strange…okay well, time for something straightforward and not iterrupteded like

Riku: Can you speak right or something?

Me: Nope!

Riku: Then go to kindergarden and learn your speech again

Me: IS THAT AN INSULT?!!! **hits Riku over the head with the whale**

Riku: Twinkle twinkle little star!

Okay….here's the fic all together-maybe!

After Roxas had finished singing joyfully that his friend-or evil Monica obessed friend-he put the trumpet away and walked away from the Rabid Squirrels, making a peace treaty. Also, he told them he knew where MR.WHISKERS was. They told him to bring their KING MR.WHISKERS back to them.

Just as Roxas was heading back to Hollywood, he spotted Xemnas break dancing and talking on the phone in a-was that a balarena suit? Yes it was! Roxas screamed in horror and ran away from his FORMER boss TURNED RABID SQUIRREL PUPPET!!

As Roxas walked down Hollywood, he saw the MEOW MIX INC. and went inside, looking for his precious kitty-kitty MR.WHISKERS. He found MR.WHISKERS BREAK DANCING on the floor in front of a camera singing, "I got da power!"

Roxas blinked, holy shit what was up?! _The ceiling_ a voice answered in his head. Roxas growled at the second voice in his head and grabbed MR.WHISKERS.

MEANWHILE….

Sephiroth (FFVII) glared at Sephiroth (KH) while Sephiroth (CC) glared at Sephiroth (BC(Before Crisis)) "HEY!" Sephy (CC) accused, "Where the hell did YOU come from?!"

Sephy(BC): From there

Sephiroth(FFVII) grabs his MASAMUNE and starts hacking at SEPHY(KH), hoping to cut off the two extra wings at the bottom and the one wing on his shoulder. To Sephy (FFVII) it ruined his looks….

Me: They're idiots!

Riku: No duh!

Vincent: Can I go trigger happy on them?!

Riku: YES!

Me: N!O You'll kill the entertainment!

Vincent: Aw Darn!

Kristen: HISS! That is MY LINE TOO!

Kaci: OH BURN!

Kristen: **blinks** What the hell?

Saix: OH KRISTEN!!!!

Kristen: I'M DEVORED REMEMBER SAIX?!

Saix: aww!!!! HEY LAREXEN!

Larexen: Sorry! I'm happily married to Girly Pink Scythe Man-I mean Marluxia!

Saix: Darn! XEMNAS!!!!

Xemnas: **does acrobatic move and breaks Saix's neck**

Everyone: YAY!!!!

Riku: Hey! Wait a sec! Isn't Xemnas supposed to be killed in here?! NOT SAIX!

Me: You'd prefer Saix alive?

Riku: Pass

Me: Good

&&&

Sorry guys!!! Yeah yeah yeah! I DO NOT care if this is the last chappie of KILL XEMNAS. Um….did I just give that away? Opps….DON'T HIT ME!!!!

Oh and, Xemnas is on the Internet!!!

Is coming soon!! Also the random fan fic I am about to type called: Investigation: Squall Leonhart is coming too!!!!! That is everythign about what happens in that stupid Investigation/Court House place with Squall and Riku and Reporter and all-uh-everybody. Moomba!!! I SHALL PUT THEM IN THERE!!!!! Along with Leon(Squall) COPY; Laguna(for fun!);Ellone(I don't like her! She's annoying!); all Sephys; Me; Riku

Yeah! Look for it on my profile. If there was a quicker way to e-mail all you peeps for updates on these things, I WOULD do that IF I weren't so lazy…did I just admit that? Opps….

Um…Kristen can no longer kill me cause I killed her husband! BUT Kaci, my other friend has entered the continuing sieries of Organization XIII!

OH!!!!! Maybe, instead of Calling the next book Xemnas on the Internet; I should call it Organization XIII's Organs…or maybe not…BUT ORGANIZATION HAS THE WORD ORGAN IN IT!!!!! Amazing isn't it?! Nope…not really!

Well I have some other fan fics I'm working on too, so that's why I haven't updated in SUCH A LONG TIME!!!

Yeah…okay so I've only worked three of my fan fics:

Final Fantasy VII and VIII

Kill Xemnas

A Shadowed Heart

You can get over it! Heh-heh…Well I WILL work on the whoel INVESTIGATION SQUALL LEONHART. (It WILL be placed in Kingdom Hearts cause it has A LOT of KH characters in it along with Final Fantasy VIII, though I may place it in FFVIII, I dunno, I'll put which ever it is on my profile!!!!


End file.
